Steve McAlphabet Motorcycling Music Across America
Lemme Say A Little Somethin’ About My Presidential Candidacy

Lemme Say A Little Somethin’ About My Presidential Candidacy

Believe it or not, I think I have given more thought than most to the idea of running for president. To even consider such a thing requires a ridiculously large ego, which I just so happen to have, and at least some vision for changing the world, whether it be to actually benefit the world or just to enhance the world of the ego. Suffice it to say, I have given it considerable thought over the years for both reasons.

Like most American children, I was fed the idea that I could be anything I wanted to be, and for some reason, that recitation usually included the possibility of becoming the President of the United States. And although I’ve usually dismissed the idea as a ridiculous delusion, as many who are reading this now are doing, I’ve not really found any other jobs that I’m necessarily equipped to do, so it may very well be that President of the United States could be right up my alley. Besides, I’ve had quite a few people tell me they’d vote for me.

Before I get into what I’d do as President, let me give you a little background as to the synchronicities that have spurred on this particular delusion for me. For starters, a century ago, John Ringling had intended for Bird Key, which is a mile from my home, to be the winter White House for President Harding, but upon his untimely death in 1923, that vision was dashed. Nevertheless, in the 101 years since, Sarasota has had its share of visits and associations with various Presidents.

Other than Nixon, who took the dollar off the gold standard 2 weeks after my birth (which is a whole other topic I wrote about in my book Money, Sex, Power, & Faith: Questioning The Building Blocks of Civilization), every president in my lifetime has visited Sarasota. George W Bush was here on September 11th, the day after I had passed through New York City and been unable to see the twin towers due to the fog. I got to see Barack Obama speak when he came through town on his first campaign, and we also share the same birthday, exactly ten years apart..

Unfortunately, I have more ties to Trump than I like to admit. The last job I had before deciding to give up money for a year in 2010 was working for Andy Badolato, who last paid me by scrounging for change in his glove compartment of his Porsche and is now serving 36 months for his part in the “We Build The Wall” scam with Steve Bannon. I also met a guy named Brad who claimed to have let Bannon use his Casey Key address to commit voter fraud.

The Sarasota Republican Party named Donald Trump their “Statesman of the Year” on two separate occasions. I had a ticket to where he was speaking at the Van Wezel, which was about a five minute walk from my house, a week before he announced his campaign for the presidency, but I think I decided to stay home and get high. I still don’t regret the decision. 

Also, the company he recently merged with to get Truth Social on the stock exchange as DJT is also based in Sarasota. But hey, we’ve got great sunsets so cut us some slack. Besides, Sarasota is where I was introduced to Will Rogers.

In 2017, I was invited to audition for The Players Theater production of The Will Rogers Follies. I didn’t know much about Will Rogers when I got the roll on my birthday, but a hundred years ago, he was the biggest celebrity of his time and became the only person in history to be invited to speak at both the Republican and Democratic conventions in the same year, the year after he visited Sarasota.

Not only did Will Rogers bring his wit and wisdom to those conventions in 1928, but that same year, Life magazine, which was a humor magazine at the time, created the Anti Bunk Party and nominated Will Rogers as their presidential candidate to get the bunk out of politics. When he didn’t win any electoral votes, Will Rogers stated that the Anti Bunk Party was just 100 years ahead of time.

For all of these reasons, I have been considering a presidential run in 2028. However, over my spring break a couple of weeks ago, I was trying very hard to convince myself to run this year. I have been planning to ride my motorcycle across the country again anyway so why not make it a campaign tour? Wouldn’t it be an interesting turn of events to have a poet in the White House? 

Don’t get me wrong. I am all for Amanda Gorman being there one of these days, but in the meantime, until she is old enough, I think I might be able to at least make it a little more manageable for her when she takes the Oval Office. I’ve even already written a poem called “If I Were Elected President” that introduces the radical ideas of creating a fourth branch of the government to actually represent the people by integrating ABC Squared Economics to cultivate the Artistry of our lives, the service of our Business, the engagement of our Citizenry, and the development of our Community.

Nevertheless, despite all of the interesting coincidences, I don’t really want to run for president right now. I’m still working on getting people to listen to my songs, watch my videos, and read my books. And as bad as I am at that, it’s still a lot more fun than trying to get people to vote for me. Besides, I’ve got too many things to do to think about getting a real job. 

This year, I’m releasing a new song every week as Steve McAlphabet through all of the music distribution channels, I’ve just started releasing my 12 part web series called The Road To Will about my 10,500 mile motorcycle tour to revisit the legacy of Will Rogers, and I’ll be riding from Sarasota to Seattle to reach my goal of riding to all 48 contiguous states in 4 years (I’ve ridden 40,000 miles through 40 states and 2 provinces). And of course, I’m still offering custom typewriter poetry. So I really don’t have time for a presidential campaign right now.

Nevertheless, if you don’t want to vote for any of the chuckleheads currently on the roster, you’re welcome to write me in in the states of Alabama, Delaware, Iowa, New Hampshire, New Jersey, Oregon, Vermont, or Wyoming. None of the other states would count. But please know that I have spent most of my life as a voter with no party affiliation, yet with equal spurts as a Republican when I was a wide-eyed Christian teen and as a Democrat for a few years as a desperate adult. Unfortunately, I don’t believe either of those corporations is working for us, and I would really love to someday see their duopoly brought to an end.

But if there’s anything left after the maelstrom we’re about to go through, let’s see what happens in 2028. Perhaps the Anti Bunk Party will get the revival it needs and we can finally get the bunk out of politics. At the moment, it appears as if we can’t get the bunk out of politics because politics is entirely comprised of bunk.