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Will Rogers

Here’s a sampling of what you can expect from Steve’s Will Rogers performance

How Will Rogers Revived and The Cowboy Cabaret are related

An edited version of Will Rogers’ 1922 film The Ropin’ Fool, showcasing his skill with a lariat.

Will Rogers reads from the newspaper in the Players’ production of The Will Rogers Follies.

The soliloquey from the Players’ production of The Will Rogers Follies.

“Our Favorite Son” from the Players’ production of The Will Rogers Follies.

During his life, between 1879 and 1935, these are some of the things that Will Rogers had to say, all of them, among others, included in a performance of Will Rogers Revived

All I know is just what I read in the papers. I’ve often said that’s an alibi for my ignorance.

Everything is changing. People are taking their comedians seriously and the politicians as a joke.

In my day, we said, ‘Things can’t go on like this’, and they didn’t, they got worse.

If America ever passes out as a great nation, we ought to put on our tombstone: America died from a delusion she had Moral Leadership.

In politics, practically everything you hear is scandal, and besides, the funny thing is that the things they are whispering ain’t half has bad as the things they have been saying right out loud.

The truth is, there are men running governments who shouldn’t be allowed to play with matches.

The short memories of the American voters is what keeps our politicians in office.

About all I can say for the United States Senate is that it opens with a prayer and closes with an investigation.

I’ve come to believe that the US is safest when Congress is in recess. This country has come to feel the same when Congress is in session as when the baby gets hold of a hammer. It’s just a question of how much damage he can do with it before we can take it away from him.

I make jokes about Congress, but the thing about my little jokes is that they don’t hurt anybody. With Congress, every time they make a joke, it’s a law. And every time they make a law, it’s a joke.

If we took Congress seriously, we would be worrying all the time.

We do have to ask ourselves, if pro is the opposite of con, what is the opposite of Congress?

It costs ten times more to govern us than it used to, and we are not governed one-tenth as good.

We cuss Congress, and we joke about ’em, but they are all good fellas at heart, and if they wasn’t in Congress, why, they would be doing something else against us that might be even worse.

Lobbyists have more offices in Washington than the President. You see, the President only tells Congress what they should do. Lobbyists tell ’em what they will do.

I tell you folks, all politics is applesauce.

We have plenty of confidence in this country, but we are a little short of good men to place our confidence in.

One of the evils of democracy is, you have to put up with the people you elect whether you want them or not.

Times have proven only one thing, and that is you can’t ruin this country, even with politics.

That we have carried as much political bunk as we have and still survived shows we are a super nation.

Things in our country run in spite of politics, not by aid of it.

You’ve got to inject humor into politics. If you ever injected truth into it, you’d have no politics.

The more you observe politics, the more you’ve got to admit that each party is worse than the other. They are each good when they are out, and each bad when they are in. There’s no way in the world you’re going to make a political party respectable unless you keep it out of office.

I think it’s fair to say that if all politicians fished instead of spoke publicly, we would be at peace with the world.

Personally, I am not a member of any organized political party. I am a Democrat.

Democrats never agree on anything, that’s why they’re Democrats. If they agreed with each other, they would be Republicans.

The difference between a Republican and a Democrat is the Democrat is a cannibal, and they have to live off each other, while the Republicans, why, they just live off the Democrats.

The Republicans have a habit of having three bad years and one good one, and the good one always happens to be on an election year. Then the Republicans have their splits right after elections while the Democrats have theirs just before an election.

But ultimately, Democrats are the only reason to vote for Republicans.

Democrats are attacking and the Republicans are defending. All the Democrats have to do is promise “what they would do if they got in.” But the Republicans have to promise “what they would do” and then explain why they haven’t already “done it.”

The Democrats and the Republicans are equally corrupt where money is concerned. It’s only in the amount where the Republicans excel.

That’s one thing about Republican Presidents. They never went in much for plans. They only had one plan. It says “Boys, my head is turned. Just get it while you can.”

Under capitalism man exploits man, see; under socialism, the reverse is true.

Money and women are the most sought after and the least known about of any two things we have.

If Wall Street paid a tax on every “game” they run, we would get enough revenue to run the government on.

People should be more concerned with the return of their principles than the return on their principal.

Too many people spend money they haven’t earned to buy things they don’t want to impress people they don’t like.

I doubt if there is a thing in the world as wrong or unreliable as history. History ain’t what it is, it’s what some writer wanted it to be, and ours is just as cockeyed as the rest.

A person only learns in two ways, one by reading, and the other by association with smarter people.

The truth is that everybody is ignorant, only on different subjects.

There is nothing so stupid as the educated man if you get him off the thing he was educated in.

Real ignorance lies not in the things you don’t know, but in the things you know that ain’t so.

There are three kinds of student. The one that learns by reading. The few who learn by observation. The rest of them have to pee on the electric fence for themselves.

Good judgment comes from experience, and a lot of that comes from bad judgment.

If a man ain’t nothin’ else, then he’s an artist. It’s the only thing he can claim to be that nobody can prove he ain’t.

My Indian ancestors used to say that You can’t tell what a man is like or what he is thinking when you are looking at him. You must get around behind him and see what he has been looking at. When you meet people, no matter what opinion you might have formed about them beforehand, why, after you meet them and see their angle and their personality, why, you can see a lot of good in all of them.

We will never have true civilization until we have learned to recognize the rights of others.